Quote of the Day

"If everyone was perfect we wouldn't have problems."

- Jason Koemans

Hope

"Even bad weeks have good days.

Even bad days have good moments.

Even bad moments have great hope.

There is always a reason to hope."

Hope sometimes means we have to look for what we don't see at first glance.

(Wow that's a quote I just came up with myself!!)

Hebrews 11:1

"Faith is being sure of what we hope for

and certain of what we do not see."

I try to find reason for hope, aka: looking for heaven here on earth, each day by writing down things I'm thankful for, or "good things" that happened. I can often find myself in the middle of one of those "bad moments" looking for a shred of good (hope).

How do you find reason to hope?

Love and Marriage

"Marriage is not just spiritual communion and passionate embraces; marriage is also three meals a day, sharing the workload and remembering to carry out the trash." Joyce Brothers


"You can create love every day by acting in a loving way and not worrying about whether you are feeling loving." Ellen Kreidman


"Love never thinks in terms of 'how little' but always in terms of 'how much.' Love gives, love knows, and love lasts." Joni Erickson Tada


And finally, a love story that you better read!! It's so precious! I think they should make a movie out of it!!

The Art of a Good Marriage

excerpt from 

“The Art of a Good Marriage”

by Wilferd Arlan Peterson

"A good marriage must be created.

In marriage the "little" things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say, ”I love you" at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry.

It is having a mutual sense of values, and common objectives.

It is standing together and facing the world.

It is forming a circle that gathers in the whole family.

It is speaking words of appreciation, and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.

It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not only marrying the right person -- it is being the right partner."

To Love and To Choose

There were many titles for this post bouncing around in my head.  "Deja Vu"..."The Worst Road Trip Ever"..."I Think I Can I Think I Can"..."I Think I Can't"...

Then chapel yesterday really changed my mind. It was a dedication chapel and we were challenged to think about something God has been putting on our hearts and then dedicate this semester to pursuing it. I immediately knew one big thing, it's something I heard at church on Sunday: "Don't try to be good. Just fall in love with God." I am such a doer. I always have lists and goals and things I need to do to be good. Don't get me wrong, I love God. But I tend to be too much of a Martha. Ever since I heard those words on Sunday they stuck with me, and they're really freeing actually! How much "easier" is it to fall in love than it is to "be good"?! So I'm going to stop trying and stop doing and I'm simply going to fall in love. Love. Simply love. Simply be loved. Be filled. Not do. Be.

The other dedication I made was to choose. The idea that my attitude/response is my choice regardless of the external circumstances has come up a lot lately. Our Saving Your Marriage books said, "Choose your attitude by changing your self-talk." The next chapter was about choosing to view things in their best light. So I have decided to choose happiness. To choose to see things in their best light. To chose the benefit of the doubt. To choose thankfulness. To choose to trust God. 

To love and to choose, that is my dedication.

These weren't easy decisions to come to. Everything in me wanted to be lonely. To complain. To feel inadequate. To do things. To be there (July 30, 2011) not here. I was not looking forward to any more time away from Jason. I tried to pep-talk myself with "I Think I Can I Think I Can", but then that turned into "I Think I Can't." I was missing him so much and I didn't want to admit that I should be looking forward to conquering this last semester apart!! Being reminded that my self-talk will choose my attitude, I tried to turn those thoughts around. I knew I'd only be more miserable if I didn't choose happiness and choose to see things in the best light.

I was not looking forward to the loneliness I'd be faced with, because not only am I away from Jason and my family, but my roommate is in Germany so I have my own room, all my close friends life off campus, and our hall is not very close. The "Deja Vu" title was because I feel like a freshman again - not knowing anyone and having to make friends. I was not looking forward to trying to make new/more friends because I'm not good at it. But God showed up. One of my "little sisters" in the hall left me an encouraging note. A few other girls wanted me to go to lunch at our dining hall with them. At dinner I was prepared to sit alone but then another girl invited me to sit with her. One of my off-campus friends, Courtney, was able to come here and we went running. Another off-campus friend, Mel, came by quick to say hi. I wanted to be stubborn and stay lonely. I wanted my friends, not new friends. But I had to admit, God showed up and met my loneliness.

My road trip here was one of those trips where you couldn't sleep the night before, were exhausted and sleepy driving 9 hours, and where everything took longer than it should have. But guess what? God showed up. After taking two hours to get from the outskirts of Portland in rush-hour traffic to Corie's house, she said I could just spend the night! So instead of getting back to Corban and facing the lonely-flu (I already had the symptoms), I got to spend the night with her talking and watching the Bachelor.

So I've made this dedication to love and to choose. Hold me to it. Evaluate my posts and if needed, remind me to choose to view things in the best light. I have so much to be thankful for, so much to experience and enjoy in my time right here and now. There are exciting classes for me to take that will prepare me for being a certified personal trainer. There are the girls at youth group that I'm leading and discipling (that's a whole other post...that's where I feel inadequate sometimes). There are my close friends to go visit at their houses/apartments. There are new/more friends to make. There are challenges and ways to grow. There is my track season. There is so much here for me right now. Jason and I can grow and fall more in love. I can spend even more time with God. 

I want to soak it all up and live with no regrets. I only get each day once.

Something to think about...

"You are what you think you are." 

Choose your attitude by changing your self-talk.

"Once we have found someone whom we can love, we are nourished by the overwhelming satisfaction that brings. We glimpse in that satisfaction something that has eternal merit and is more profound than anything we have ever known. We are lifted out of our daily lives into an experience that transcends life itself."

Edward Ford

And when you dream...dream big

"Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so you shall become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil."

Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts

"Love must be learned, and learned again and again; there is no end to it."

In Him All Things Hold Together

"A Christian marrige is [not] one without any problems or even a marriage with fewer problems... But it does mean a life in which two people are able to accept...and love each other in the midst of problems and fears...[and] without constantly trying to change [each other]-- because they realize personally that they have been accepted by Christ." Keith Miller

"The nobelest question in the world is,

'what good may i do in it?'"

Benjamin Franklin

"God promised the world --

why on earth would you settle for less?!"

Sacred.

The pastor said something in church on Sunday that really stuck out to me, and I think it could revolutionize the way I treat people!

He said that we need to view people and ourselves as the dwelling place of God. I am sacred. They are sacred. This makes people and myself worth investing in.

Love doesn't make sense sometimes.

"Darling, my darling, one line in haste to tell you that I love you more today than ever in my life before, that I never see beauty without thinking of you or scent happiness without thinking of you... You have intensified all colors, heightened all beauty, deepened all delight." [Duff Cooper]

Jason sent me a package that I got today! In it was a calendar page with the above quote =) A "Sweetheart Deluxe First Aid Kit" (heart shaped band-aids), a flash-drive with songs, chocolate covered coffee beans, a letter, and $3 for a coffee! He is such a sweetheart!

Lately I've been learning that love doesn't make sense, and that's how you know it's true love, because true love is a small taste of God's love, which is the ultimate example of true love, and God's love for me doesn't make sense. For example in Hosea. God called Hosea to love even when it hurt, even when there was unfaithfulness, even when there was mistakes. He called Hosea to a sacrificial love, a redeeming love. That's how God loves. The love He called Hosea to practice is the same way that He loves us, and it's how He calls us to love. It's why love is a choice sometimes. It's why love doesn't always make sense. There are countless times when I've messed up so bad and treated the one I love terribly. I feel like I should've used up my chances long ago. I feel like I should be loved less, because the world has trained me to view love as a measure based on my performance. But God's unconditional, self-sacrificing love breaks this worldly mold, and it's hard for me to wrap my mind around. He says I can't use up my chances. He says He loves me more. If God didn't love me unconditionally, I'd have been lost long ago. Fear cannot exist in God's perfect love, because His love casts out the fear of punishment. (1 John 1:18). In God's perfect love for me, I don't have to fear when I blow it. He loves me. He cleanses me. He redeems me and forgives me. I don't even have to fear His discipline, because His discipline is out of love. When I blow it, I don't have to fear losing His love. God's love for me is also a jealous love, literally demanding my life, my soul, and my all. He wants the way I love Him to make all other love look like hate in comparison (Luke 14:25-33). He desperately wants me to give Him all of my attention and affection and put Him first in all things.

And another beautiful thing is I've been discovering is that God gives us human relationships as a taste of His perfect love, and Jason aims to love me with a love that comes from God. 1 John 4:16-17 says, "God is love and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. And as we live in God our love grows more perfect." The love Jason has for me is truly a taste of God's perfect love, and as Jason grows in love with God his love for me also grows and is perfected by God. Jason's love gives me the permission to be me, to make mistakes, to be imperfect, to be weak...but to be loved. If Jason didn't love me the way Christ loves the church, in a way that is redeeming and forgiving, I'd have lost him long ago. I'm so thankful and amazed by this true love that I've found. And I'm so thankful that God grows and perfects our love as we live in Him. He must be the center of us, and in all things He must be first. (Col 1:18)

This is our prayer: "That [our] love may abound more in more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that [we] may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God." (Phil 1:9-11)