Opportunities. Dilemmas. Riot. Africa.

Sorry this is long, really long!
     Yesterday I went to the youth group (called Riot) at one of the local community churches (Morning Star) to check it out as a potential volunteer. They have a huge need for women to lead small groups for the freshman girls. I enjoyed it. I was also really challenged.
     Growing up I never liked growing to youth group because I couldn't find one that was deep enough to feed me spiritually and allow me to fit in at the same time. One would be too full of cliques and no one would talk to me (Yes it was my fault too, but it's hard when you're shy.) One would have way to many games and not get into the word very much. Etc.
     Well I love how this youth group is structured. The leaders met ahead of time and prayed for the night and prayed for many students/situations by name. They actually knew the kids and spent time investing in their lives! After the leader's meeting, it was time to mingle. The leaders mingled with the kids, catching up and checking in with the ones they knew and meeting the new ones. Hugs all around. Then they split up into grade levels (freshman, sophomore, etc) and within each group introduced all the new people and just talked for a few minutes. Everyone then joined together in the sanctuary for worship (amazing) and a message. After this, they were again split by grade, but this time into small groups of same-gender. There were two big groups of freshman girls so I shadowed the leader for one of them. In the small groups they didn't sit around and talk about "nothing" (aka the latest gossip) like I'd experienced at previous youth groups, they actually talked about specific questions pertaining to the message and how the message could be played out in their individual situations. It was good and got the girls to think. That was the night!
     I really want to be a small group leader for these freshmen girls because the need is great, I would have a lot to offer, and I think God has placed it on my heart for a reason. Yet I was challenged to readily jump into this position. I find several dilemmas holding me back. For one, high-school girls intimidate me. They're dramatic. They dress cute and "in-style." They're loud and excitable. I'm not any of that. I'm not very bubbly or outgoing. I have a hard time initiating conversations and connecting. So that scares me, to try to lead them. It would stretch me and take me out of my comfort zone.
     Also, I rushed straight from practice to the leaders meeting and didn't eat dinner or get back to Corban until 9:30pm. That means from 3:20-9:30pm my time is spent practicing and then at youth group, leaving very  little time for homework. And on Thursdays I have to wake up at 5:50am for morning workout, so I can't stay up super late doing homework. I'm scared to sacrifice that huge of a chunk of my homework time. I'm scared to give up control of that much of my night. But I think God wants me to. And I know, that if this is what He wants, He'll provide the time for my homework. Besides, cross-country will be done soon, I have from 7:30am-10:20am on Thursday mornings to do homework, and next semester my class schedule will be significantly more relaxed. But it still scares me. I like control.
   But this week I've also been challenged in different ways to surrender, live with open hands, and give up my control of things. I'm gonna be praying about this opportunity, but I think I already know the answer. I will step out in faith even when I cannot see. God is good.
     The other opportunity is not for me, but for Jason. He feels a tug on his heart to go to Africa for two weeks this June. I immediately feel two emotions- excitement and worry. Ok three, cause I also start to think about missing those two weeks of spending time together. I'm excited for him, really excited! This would be an amazing opportunity and I never want to say no to the things God calls him to. But I also worry. If Jason went to Africa, it would mean no summer job for him, because 2-3 weeks in May, 2 weeks in June, and 2 weeks in July isn't consistent enough for someone to hire him. So I worry about having money to support our first year of marriage. But I also know that if God really wanted Jason to go to Africa, He would provide for our needs financially and our needs would be met. Yet again, I'm scared to give up control, even though God would do a better job of handling things anyway. Already though we've seen God meeting our needs. Jason met a lady who has a small house in La Grange that she lets Frontier couples stay in rent-free. All they have to do is pay utilities. So that would mean saving $200ish a month and having our own place! We're still looking into it and trying to make sure it's available, but that would definitely help with the money issue! And Jason is going to start donating plasma again (which they raised the pay amount for!) and look for any odd jobs he can find. So it seems God is already at work! But you can pray about that decision too!

Willamette Invitational

Today I raced what felt like the best race of my life but then I didn't PR...so that becomes a frustrating feeling. My time was 20:42 and I finished 5th on our team, 138 out of 239. I did race faster than our last meet at OIT, so that's a good sign! Here's some fun pictures!

The Corban XC Team Is On Fire!

No literally... Yesterday we just got back to campus after going to a park in Salem for practice. Our bus shut off, and when Coach Brad went to restart it, smoke started coming out of the hood. We thought it was just over-heating, so it was kinda a "oh I guess you'll have to get off the bus here" thing as we took our time getting off, until a couple people got off and saw flames under the hood! We got off much quicker after that! Everyone was off safely, and they even tried using fire extinguishers to put out the fire. That slowed it down a bit, but soon the fire spread into the whole entire bus! Windows were shattering and tires popping. The electric lines it was parked under caught on fire too and a line came down and was sparking against the pavement. Our whole bus was destroyed! God really protected us though, because no one came close to being injured. Our starting-blocks for track and coach's clipboard were the only things that got left on the bus. And the power was out last night for about three hours because of the downed line, which was a bit frustrating because I had two tests to study for! But we survived! And we laugh...because cross-country is never noticed on campus. But now everyone is talking about us! We even made the news!

Disclaimer: this news clip makes it sound more threatening than it was - we had plenty of time to get safely off the bus! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taQrwkOHacQ&feature=player_embedded

I'll post a couple pictures and maybe another video later...

Boys Will Be Boys...

It's called "buck-buck." That's all I know. I'm a girl, I don't get these things. But it does make me laugh!

"What Would Bob Marley Do?"

Hilltop News

(Corban's newspaper)

[Jake Zufelt (the husband of my RA from last year!)
Freelance Writer

I made it a point this summer to become cultured. My plan was simple: listen to NPR, read a New York Times best seller, jam to Bob Marley, hang out with heathens. To carry out this brilliant plan, I picked up a weekend gig at the coffee shop. “Free coffee and culture,” I thought to myself. “Perfect.”

I was eager to reconnect with my colleagues and learn about what’s been happening at our town’s central hub. First there was Amirah, my half Middle Eastern manager who practiced a loose form of Islam and drank boxed wine on the weekends. Next was her sister, Lyla, whose father jokingly tried to sell her in Iran for a herd of camels when she was ten. She was my fellow Bob Marley enthusiast. Then there was Erika, a 6’1 lesbian who always spoke her mind and would have contributed greatly to a sitcom. Finally, there was Taylor, a seventeen year-old rebel who drank heavily and wore men’s shirts and a sign on her forehead that said, “(fill-in-the-blank) off!”

The initial conversations were basic: Joe “Dirt” and Joe “Clean” were still getting their tall Americanos, the building owner is still screwing with the doctor’s wife who works next door, and the Christian camp staff still doesn’t tip, doesn’t smile, and calls the headquarters every day if the “Artist of the Month” hangs a suggestive painting.

As the summer progressed so did my conversations with co-workers, specifically about Christianity. I learned from Erika that she grew up in church, but phased out when she didn’t comply with the teaching anymore. Taylor was content with rebelling against her alcoholic father and passive mother, and preferred drinking away her problems rather than dealing with them. Amirah and Lyla were well liked and goal-oriented; a complete life change seemed unnecessary.

My cause received no help from across the counter. Sunday mornings were filled with people who were upset because they were late for church, a group of conservative twenty-somethings would sit around in exclusivity and read their Bibles to each other, and the Christian camp staff would demand that Bob Marley be turned off whenever they were in the coffee shop. For the first time, I saw the Christian culture from the outside, and I was ashamed.

Erika and I were preparing to close when we noticed that Laura was the only customer left. She hid her face as she hovered over a weathered notebook, writing furiously.

“You think she’s okay?” Erika asked. I shrugged. As my co-worker approached the table, I noticed a steady stream of tears coming down Laura’s face. Erika listened intently for several minutes before giving her a hug and returning to the other side of the counter.

“She’s dying,” Erika said solemnly. “Some rare influenza. The doctor is giving her just under two years to live.”

“One love / one heart / let’s get together and feel all right / hear the children cryin’ / sayin’ give thanks and praise the Lord and I will feel all right / sayin’ lets get together and feel all right.”

I was challenged to evaluate my faith that night. It’s hard not to when a lesbian does the work of a Christian, and Bob Marley sounds a lot like Jesus.]

This article really challenged me too. I'm not sure quite how to respond. Or quite sure what it looks like to be authentic and real. How do we pop this Christian bubble?

"Once we have found someone whom we can love, we are nourished by the overwhelming satisfaction that brings. We glimpse in that satisfaction something that has eternal merit and is more profound than anything we have ever known. We are lifted out of our daily lives into an experience that transcends life itself."

Edward Ford

OIT Meet in Klamath Falls

"Take my feet and let them be

Swift and beautiful for Thee"

On Friday afternoon our cross-country team took a 4 hour bus ride up to Klamath Falls, Oregon, for a Saturday meet hosted by OIT (Oregon Institute of Technology) at Steen Sports Camp. This was the first meet I got to compete in and our teams first 5k meet, although they'd run a 3k meet two weekends earlier. I was nervous. The race was awful. I ran a 22:33 which I'm pretty sure is worse than anything I've ever run in high school! The course is TOUGH! It had hills, parts in thick mushy grass, and parts in sandy/dusty/powder. You couldn't settle in strong and find rhythm because the whole time you were working. The only good about it was everyone ran slow. The first place girl usually runs in the 17s and she ran a 19:01! And I did still place with the top 5 for my team! I'm ready to conquer the next race! More pictures to come!